“O Lord, don’t rebuke me in your anger or discipline me in your rage! Your arrows have struck deep, and your blows are crushing me. Because of your anger, my whole body is sick; my health is broken because of my sins. My guilt overwhelms me— it is a burden too heavy to bear. My wounds fester and stink because of my foolish sins. I am bent over and racked with pain. All day long I walk around filled with grief. A raging fever burns within me, and my health is broken. I am exhausted and completely crushed. My groans come from an anguished heart. You know what I long for, Lord; you hear my every sigh. My heart beats wildly, my strength fails, and I am going blind. My loved ones and friends stay away, fearing my disease. Even my own family stands at a distance. Meanwhile, my enemies lay traps to kill me. Those who wish me harm make plans to ruin me. All day long they plan their treachery. But I am deaf to all their threats. I am silent before them as one who cannot speak. I choose to hear nothing, and I make no reply. For I am waiting for you, O Lord. You must answer for me, O Lord my God. I prayed, “Don’t let my enemies gloat over me or rejoice at my downfall.” I am on the verge of collapse, facing constant pain. But I confess my sins; I am deeply sorry for what I have done. I have many aggressive enemies; they hate me without reason. They repay me evil for good and oppose me for pursuing good. Do not abandon me, O Lord. Do not stand at a distance, my God. Come quickly to help me, O Lord my savior.”
Psalms 38:1-22 NLT
Psalm 38 is an interesting one because of the way in which it deals with confession. David is a sinful man and the Bible makes no attempt to hide this fact. This isn’t just recorded in the records of his actions in Kings or Chronicles, but also in the Psalms, in his own words. Yet, it is clear that David doesn’t view his persecution as punishment or a righteous act. He views it as injustice against his righteousness and God’s. This confession highlights how dynamic his thought process is. He views his sin as evil with massive ramifications. He acknowledges that all of his personal ailments, are because of it, and yet everything external is from his enemies. He also links his personal ailments physical side, and emotional side. He notes that his own sin is destroying his countenance as well as is making him sick. Therefore, he doesn’t excuse his depression as something medically happening to him, but rather something he has perpetrated upon himself by way of his sin. His confession is selective and dynamically aware of what is true and false. While it calls him sinful, it doesn’t not call him worthless. It also doesn’t dismiss his own behavior as something happening to him but rather something he must overcome in grace. Beyond this, it does not conflate his sin with the wickedness of those who sin against him, nor does it then allow for others to be injustice toward him. As we confess our sins before God, we ought to remember these things.
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